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> An Invisible Fade (revised), Times Ten Mar 4 16 RC James
RC James
post Mar 9 16, 12:57
Post #1


Assyrian
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Posts: 250
Joined: 1-November 15
Member No.: 5,282
Real Name: richard chase
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Rhapsody



Pale horses
set the pace
for my dream
in the twilight.

I hear engines hum
as I tramp the river bank.

My mind has turned violet now
as I grasp the fact of denoument
and cringe,
realizing what I strive for,

yes,

is dissolving.






tramp
violet
horses
twilight
pale
hum
pace
strive
cringe
grasp
 
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Luce
post Mar 9 16, 19:08
Post #2


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From: Sunny Florida
Member No.: 5,293
Real Name: YC
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:TCP



Very cool and intriguing poem Richard. You used the 10 words well.

These word challenges can definitely stimulate the gray cells, can they?

Would look over the punctuation, if I were you (see L6 especially).

I can see this going to the crit boards easily.

Luce
 
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Merlin
post Mar 13 16, 10:43
Post #3


Ornate Oracle
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From: Time, Immoral
Member No.: 66
Writer of: Poetry



Hello RC,

interesting images spring into mind.
The last - dissolving - makes me hope there isn't a wet spot left behind while dreaming.

M


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