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faux-ku, titled haiku/senryu w/word play [ Daniel's 'creation' ] |
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Jul 20 04, 14:11
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Faux-ku is my own brain child, developed over a long time of playing with haiku and senryu. My Light, so to speak, dabbles in wit, and hopefully it has its place in haiku/senryu-type poetry. This form can have seriousness, but it will always be dressed in Light clothing. (Just remember, these threads are for us to PRACTICE in! Let NO ONE suppose that I'm here to be a teacher. I AIN'T! But practicing in short forms, I believe, can improve one's ability in other forms, including Haiku. However, I AM the expert in faux-ku merely because it is my own baby! I'm willing to engage a tutor to bring it to maturity, if one is here and available to me. The absolute criteria for faux-ku:
1) a fetching title [ haiku and senryu never have a title ]
( title must be or have a play on words )
2) haiku/senryu form [ two snapshots ]
[ 5-7-5 syllables... or 3-2-3 beats -- OR LESS ! ]
one snapshot in two lines
another snapshot in one line
or vice versa
3) word-play in each snapshot (as well as in title) Initial Samples: high coopfoxy but chicken – red hens turned into roosters often high in trees © Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002out to launchthree nautical girls -- malled by low-price salers during their noon break © Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002 loud warningred sails in sunset clash crewedly once a blue moon; mutin’ ears marooned © Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002 stocking up downwhite sales for son sets precedent: Martha Stewart fitted stock preferred © Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002 dark fearsscared by Dad's visits? at bottom had you been switched to a light sleeper? © Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002 sub lime piecesyou've run out? blimey! just cut up with ripe lemons to post on our glass © Daniel J Ricketts 10 Dec 2002 Now it's YOUR turn!DeLightingly, Daniel 8)
P.S. One other concern... We reserve the responsibility to throw Sue out for several days at a time if she shows signs of addiction!
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Sep 23 04, 16:05
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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blown aweigh in Bill-lows
president got cot with print down... lying still, sheets pillowed to wind
© M Lee Dickens’ son 23 Sept 2004
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Nov 8 04, 06:40
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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a chant’s meeting
throat dried up in knots; then, about to cry uncle, had auntie phone back
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Feb 4 05, 06:25
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Christmas swish
mosquito buzzed sheep throughout that ebon Eve; Baa, hum-bug!
© Daniel J Ricketts 04 Feb 2005
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Feb 4 05, 10:45
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Here's the one I promised James with a bit o' hillbilly homor: dis agreein’ house affect
global warmin' may raze see level from oh zone? a bunch o' hot air
© Daniel J Ricketts 04 Feb 2005
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Guest_Jox_*
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Feb 4 05, 11:11
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Guest
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LOL Daniel - thank you very much!
And all the others are most chucklesome, too.
Well done with your invention... have looked here before but these are very good. You should start a competition for the best to popularise this new form of yours - (no prizes) - just ku-dos.
Cheers and thanks, James.
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Feb 4 05, 11:45
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Thank you James... and for the ku-dos suggestion too. LOL I'll tell you what: you may announce the comptetition yourself, with this as the come-on... if you like. ( I don't know about doing such things! ): fabricating con test
we’ll give no ku-dough; ‘twill be for intertwining friend with faux © Daniel J Ricketts 04 Feb 2005 Lightly, Daniel
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Guest_Toumai_*
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Feb 4 05, 12:39
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Guest
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Hi Daniel,
You're the king of the faux-ku, but I'll try
Fran
No Con Test
friends tied up in Nots; argue-meant creatively: whine comes from sour grapes
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Feb 4 05, 13:59
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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QUOTE (Toumai @ Feb. 04 2005, 12:39) Hi Daniel, You're the king of the faux-ku, but I'll try. ~ Fran No Con Test
friends tied up in Nots; argue-meant creatively: whine comes from sour grapes Well, Fran, since I've yet to be paid for my faux-ku...there will be NO-PRO TEST from me! You've done absolutely perfectly! Now isn't that both fun and stretching? Here's a follow-up for you: epi-khaki mouse
suicidal squeek… whoot argh you over it? you threw up your clause
© Daniel J Ricketts 04 Feb 2005 Looking forward to more from your pen, deLightedly, Daniel
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Guest_Jox_*
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Feb 4 05, 14:05
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Guest
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Hi Daniel... Can put an announcement about a contest if you don't mind judging the results?
If you are really intertested just let me have a closing date and number of entries per person allowed (and any other details you want) and we'll promo it.
James.
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Feb 4 05, 14:44
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Hey, James...
I'll personally judge the contest and offer as a prize, a copy of the new literary journal: Mary Clark's (Poetic-Voices) Impressions... which is due out right soon. How about three entries per person, and entries do by the close of our "Presidents' Day" Monday, 21 Feb... in time for George Washington's Birthday (Tuesday, 22 Feb) so that I can offer my judgment on his day: "I cannot tell a lie."
In anticipation of the event, let me offer this Revolutionary Retro piece:
FLOG back words
Big George drives 'em far, chips well, but can’t putt ‘em down; cannot read a lie!
© Daniel J Ricketts 04 Feb 2005
slicing sLightly into the rough, Daniel
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Feb 6 05, 06:53
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Hi Daniel.
I just added three new 'awards' to MM yesterday in our FAQ forum.
In these 'practice and learning threads' here in Karnak we do not award prizes if a member seeks to initiate a challenge/contest, but we can start using one of the new awards if you'd like to pursue a contest here in this tile?
What do you think of this award below?
*New Greek Urn (formerly Mod Choice)
*Graphic provided by Celtic Castle Designs
This award may be used for internal member challenges. Any member can initiate a challenge, state your rules, and choose a winner.
If you are interested, lay out your specific rules, start and end date and what you will be looking for and I will send a PM to the members.
This post has been edited by Cleo_Serapis: Aug 22 06, 18:50
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Mar 29 05, 11:44
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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no faux-ku a ward
if you’d write a wrong don’t lift a finger to aide; biting it tinders
© MLee Dickens’son 29 March 2005
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Jun 28 05, 13:49
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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milk weed ?
what made cow wander in from her verdant meadow ? was it smoking grass?
© Daniel J Ricketts 28 June 2005
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Sep 4 05, 05:44
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Now how in the world did I miss that, Fran!? Cute... now where is your TITLE? Here's another thought for you: kneed super vision
management de-find: missing section manager; depart meant head out
© Daniel J Ricketts 03 Sept 2005
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Guest_Toumai_*
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Sep 4 05, 06:32
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Guest
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Hi Daniel, good to see you :wave:
I'd forgotton all about that one (entirely inspired by yours, of course) ... shall ponder a title.
Like the comment on management, hehe.
Fran
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Sep 4 05, 14:36
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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While you're thinking of a title, Fran, here's another faux-ku to stimulate you further:
eschewing the fat noon facial hair trim makes high protein wrap filler; day-lite shavings thyme © Daniel J Ricketts 02 Sept 2005
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Nov 29 05, 11:07
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,130
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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heavy wait ticked off, thanks given hands encircled luscious food; too many seconds © MLee Dickens’son 29 Nov 2005
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Guest_Toumai_*
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Nov 29 05, 15:00
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Guest
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Hi Daniel
Clocking in again, lol? Good to see you :cheer:
Fran
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