Raspberries Hill, free-verse Options

[jerryk]

Raspberries Hill

I was too young for that war.
Coal-fired locomotives
were the smoke-belching dragons
that dragged draftees away
to boot camps, then to be
swallowed up in battle.

Train loads of young men
passed our Raspberry Hill.
At each whistle blow we stopped
picking berries from bush
and each other’s lips, rushed
to the bridge, leaned over the railing,
waiting for the dragon’s smoke
and vapor to carry us to his fearful
lair among the clouds.

Then, one day, we heard the whooshing
of wings. Not the dragon, but an army
scout plane hard-landed on the railroad tracks.

The uninjured pilot grinned goofily and waved
“Hey, kids! Did ya see him?”
“Who?”
“The Jap with a blister on his behind….”
But there were no Japanese soldiers here;
that boy must’ve been flying upside down too long.

Someone scampered down the embankment,
ran along the tracks, waving a bandana
to stop the approaching dragon.
The monster screeched, stopped just in time.

We looked at those faces below
peering through windows;
enemy prisoners, heading for POW camp.

After a while the dragon snorted,
puffed and screamed. We rushed
to the other bridge railing for one more look
at those foreign soldiers.

“Crummy Nazies...” someone said,
but the rest was swallowed
up by the shrieking dragon
that turned around the bend
and then out of sight.

We put more berries in our bucket.
She placed one between her lips,
and I stole it with mine.
On Raspberry Hill.

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Jerry, I liked this, I would think it very hard to land a plane on the railroad tracks, awful bumpy...Japanese and German prisoners of war, before my time. My war was Vietnam. Interesting juxtaposition between war and raspberries... I love the last stanza...our hills were blueberries and wild strawberries. I don't see any nits. Although you might try using italics for quotes, makes it stand out more.
I'd be having more fun today if my speakers had shown up yesterday, now I got to wait for monday...

Take care
Steve

[jerryk]

Hi there, Steve.
I was nearly 10 years old at that time, a little young for actively participating in WWII, but not too young for the following war. Thank you for your input, and it's interesting that none of us oldsters really care to speak of our own war experiences; I surely don't. Thank you, my friend. Much appreciate your comment, and I hope your speakers will arrive.

Jerry

[Sekhmet]

A childhood memory, fresh as new paint, (or raspberry juice).
I loved the feeling of involved non-involvement. Kids get what excitement
they can from war.

We London kids collected bits of shot-down Luftwaffe planes and, from the ruins of bombed out homes, shrapnel from the exploded bombs as trophies.
For many months, London was carpet bombed. German bombers dropped their cargo on on us night after night; and we kids listened in silence when the engines of the V1's (Doodlebugs) stopped overhead. We counted down from ten seconds. Then came the explosion - not us this time.
I expect German kids did much the same.

Leo

[jerryk]

Hi, dear Leo;
thanks for your nice comment. I'm glad you survived that conflict and those harrowing incidents. There is a wonderful movie about the London Blitz and how it affected children and adults. It seems that kids are programmed to make the best of situations, even war. The title is "Hope and Glory." Humorous incidents galore, mixed with the reality of war. Look for it if you can. Thank you, and I'm glad to have met you, Leo. Be well,

Jerry (no, not the one that came over London, night after night, lol)

[Peterpan]

Hello jerryk~

I can appreciate and understand your poem. I wish, with all of us being exposed to movies like The Hurt Locker and The Messenger, that those in control, could prevent war...It upsets me terribly. I could not dream of sending my child to war to kill another mothers child...My Great- uncle was in prison during the Second World War, he was missing for 2 years...Thought dead...and then he came alive and arrived on the doorstep! My Grandfather was in Italy and Egypt for 5 years...He came home safely too, and lived to a ripe old age. But, war is very sad.

I recently dived the Thistlegorm (in Egypt)...absolutely amazing...

But, keep writing, perhaps it will remind people of the horrors of war.

Bev

[jerryk]

Hi Peterpan;
such a neat nom de plume; love it. I have not seen either movie but did a little research on both. I believe that war will always hold a certain fascination for most of us. Personally, I will no longer take part in it, certainly not for the reasons criminal politicians feed us.
Your relatives were fortunate to have survived their ordeal, but I can appreciate the family's anxiety. I've been lucky as well; let that suffice, lol. As an amateur military historian I am familiar with the sinking of Thistledown, but I envy you that you actually visited that wreck; that is amazing, indeed. I have the story of another ship in mind, one that I may or may not post. I'm reluctant to do so, for it deserves a larger readership than MM's, sorry to say. But you are right; wars are horrible and stupid. My doctor's father in law just published his own experiences in one Indo-Pakistani war that left him blinded. So, madness pervades the world. Take care, and thank you for the comment.
Jerry

Hello jerryk~

I can appreciate and understand your poem. I wish, with all of us being exposed to movies like The Hurt Locker and The Messenger, that those in control, could prevent war...It upsets me terribly. I could not dream of sending my child to war to kill another mothers child...My Great- uncle was in prison during the Second World War, he was missing for 2 years...Thought dead...and then he came alive and arrived on the doorstep! My Grandfather was in Italy and Egypt for 5 years...He came home safely too, and lived to a ripe old age. But, war is very sad.

I recently dived the Thistledown (in Egypt)...absolutely amazing...

But, keep writing, perhaps it will remind people of the horrors of war.

Bev

[Peterpan]

Hi ~ thanks for your swift reply...
I had an amazing experience during and after diving the Thistlegorm...we slept in our boat above the wreck for the night. The current there happens to be very strong. I had disturbed sleep, vivid dreams. During the dive (a day dive) I was affected by the dead...the horror of the great ship resting at the bottom of the ocean unnerved/and upset me. We saw the locomotive which had bounced off the deck in the blast and the jeeps, gumboots and wares. The Captain's bath filled with sand and the very much alive, visiting fish...I strangely enough, felt close to my Grandfather at that time, although he came home safely from the war. He was nearby, in Alex, exactly at the time of the bombing. I have always wanted to see the pyramids...I saw them, and on return realised that in my attic, I had pastel drawings of them, brought home from the war by my Grandfather...I coveted them from my Grandmother (as a child) before she died and they had my name on the back in her handwriting...I was meant to go to Egypt...

[jerryk]

Hello again, Peterpan;
I can totally relate to your experience; one has that feeling of revisiting the past, and it surrounds one. Rocking upon the water in particular gives one that queer impression that the fallen are reaching out. Some people feel nothing, but a few of us are sensitive to these things. My son, a former Coastguard man and now about to retire from the US Navy told me of similar experiences, and we compared our thoughts....
So glad that your Grandfather then lived a long life. And I'm delighted that you did get to see the Pyramids; that's wonderful. I've seen much of Italy and the northern countries, but in Rome one is surrounded by history. Yes, and you were meant to visit Egypt; it's like a pilgrimage you felt compelled to undertake. Wonderful visiting with you. Take care,
Jerry

Hi ~ thanks for your swift reply...
I had an amazing experience during and after diving the Thistlegorm...we slept in our boat above the wreck for the night. The current there happens to be very strong. I had disturbed sleep, vivid dreams. During the dive (a day dive) I was affected by the dead...the horror of the great ship resting at the bottom of the ocean unnerved/and upset me. We saw the locomotive which had bounced off the deck in the blast and the jeeps, gumboots and wares. The Captain's bath filled with sand and the very much alive, visiting fish...I strangely enough, felt close to my Grandfather at that time, although he came home safely from the war. He was nearby, in Alex, exactly at the time of the bombing. I have always wanted to see the pyramids...I saw them, and on return realised that in my attic, I had pastel drawings of them, brought home from the war by my Grandfather...I coveted them from my Grandmother (as a child) before she died and they had my name on the back in her handwriting...I was meant to go to Egypt...

[Peterpan]

How amazing that we can chat, share emotional and sensitive issues, and yet we are on opposite sides of the world...

Keep writing poetry...! I must get back into it. I have been distracted...

Bev

[jerryk]

Peterpan, it's been a pleasure talking to you. I will be on the lookout for your own contribution.
Someone convinced me that I should do something with my poetry, and that's one reason for being near the computer--rewriting...rewriting...rewriting, lol. Thanks so much, take care. Jerry

How amazing that we can chat, share emotional and sensitive issues, and yet we are on opposite sides of the world...

Keep writing poetry...! I must get back into it. I have been distracted...

Bev