I just haster to get faster to master
Lim'rick 'bout pasties of alabaster
but enamored by such
and unable to touch
I grabbed both of them as I ran past her.

If you grabbed them in passing, assault
you'll be charged with, and it is your fault;
if only you'd asked her
perhaps in the transfer
she'd have said, Go ahead! by default!

Got a head by default, couldn't help it;
I'm so happy that I often yelp it.
It's proven quite utheful
and I'm being truthful;
there's no reason that you'd want to skelp it.


I came in to do a quick edit, below is the original.

Got a head by default, couldn't help it;
I'm so happy that I often yelp it.
It's proven quite utheful
and I'm being truthful;
there's no reason that you'd want to skelp it.

Following the edit, this appeared after "head" in L1.
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Now that I've done a full edit, all is cleared up.

If you're thinking to skelp me, my bottom
objects; I've some bats, and I bought 'em
to keep thugs in arrears
and to lessen my fears;
I would aim at their heads, and I'd knot 'em!

If you're aiming to knot every head
with the bats which you bought, why instead
don't you swing for the walls;
you've three strikes and four balls
to hit out of the park just like Ted.

If you're dead when you come to the park
it's because it was time to embark
on adventure beyond;
it was time to respond
to the Light that awaits beyond dark.

The Light beyond dark in a tunnel
awaits a new bulb cuz the sun'll
not shine from the north
or at night and so forth;
light needs fixing, I'm sure someone'll

If you wait 'til someone'll fix light
it is possible you ain't too bright,
'cuz so few now'll make
extra effort to shake
off their laxness to just be polite.

Politely I sat on my laxness
and penciled out various faxness.
The Gummit keeps taking
much more than I'm making;
I'm almost right out of syntaxness.

In summer I oft get cranky,
feel not up to hanky-panky;
I lie on my couch
and act like a slouch,
just like a lazy-boned Yankee

My sin-taxes were paid by the Lord;
being much more than I could afford.
The whole thing is by grace
so one day I can face
Him. (I won't expect "Welcome aboard!")

Hmm, "Welcome aboard!" I'm expecting;
after all, I have been connecting
with many fine poets,
and even some do-ettes,
dissecting, rejecting, infecting!

Dissecting, rejecting, respecting...
yes it's great to have you here inspecting
all the stuff that goes on;
you've shed "Welcome!" upon
all the folks we have long been expecting!!!

Hey, Jerry! Glad to see that Lori merged your Limerick into the thread. What we're in the practice of doing down here is to simply respond to the INSTRUTIONAL original thread of the various forms.

The other habit that some of us have fallen into (as kind of a CHALLENGE) is to take all or part of the previous post to begin our own response. There's no RULE that one must do it; it's just part of the fun and mischief that we have going on to stimulate both practice and the learning process to become more fluid in the various forms. It's both EDUCATION and FUN that we've been engaging in.

Again, it's NOT A RULE, and you'll find us responding to your post no matter what you do within the thread.

Here's my response to yours, for example:

Any lazy-boned Yankee is welcome
and the Brits can drop by with their talcum;
they can post, take a powder...
just add to the chowder
we're brewing -- high water or hell-come!

Hell and high water come when we're brewing
one more meaty Limerick that's ensuing
so your welcome to write
anything smart or trite
and then tell us what new thoughts you're chewing.

When I chew on new thoughts I get fatter,
but I reckon it doesn't much matter
cuz I've given up thinking
and taken to drinking.
Now I'm much preferring the latter.


Hi Jerry - good to see you coming in here.

You prefer to be up on a ladder?
At your age, best watch out for your bladder,
and if you miss a step
you could end up with strep
from infection where you fall and splatter!

I splattered last fall, got inflection,
but that really helped my complexion.
I'm all-over tanned
and looking quite grand
from the top down past my midsection.

If your top is down past your midsection
and you feel you are tanned to perfection
do the ladies concur
with what you infer
and will that cause female insurrection?

If your bod's got female insurrection
you could break out with woman affection;
that could scare your pants off
and onlookers might scoff
at the sight they find there... an erection?!