QUOTE (Maggie @ Nov 17 12, 10:51 )
Sandy (haiku)
The hurricane comes
creeping up the eastern coast.
Devastation soon.
Hey, Peggy! Great to see you.
Actually, this is exactly the place for this haiku, since we no longer have a section specifically for 'short forms'... and in Karnak, we just either learn or practice... and mix in a lot of fun in the process often. HERE, we have the opportunity to offer and receive critique or comments.
Just a reminder that normally, haiku do not have titles, capital letters (except for Names and such) and do not use periods. Otherwise I think this piece makes an excellent and timely statement of what happened to us here... though we were fortunate to not be much affected in our little corner of New Jersey on the 'bay side'... though it would likely have been a very different story for us if Sandy had gone up the Delaware Bay as some had forecast. We were directly in its path.
Suggestion (without Title), perhaps adding a bit more punch to the first line, something maybe like...
Sandy swirls her swath
creeping up the eastern coast;
devastation soondeLighting in your sharing, Daniel