Windmills of my mind
Meandering roads trace their tar though my thoughts, skidding to a stop when reaching sensitive topics. The kind of topics one leaves tucked away in the impenetrable places of one’s mind. Sometimes they are old, sometimes they are new. Sometimes they are just simply embarrassing moments – the day my ten year old brother caught me kissing my boyfriend at the fence after a party…and he proceeded to run up to the house shouting to my parents that he saw me kissing! Of course, I had to walk into the house after the announcement.
I have kept locked away a shocking experience; an awful, old man in a long shirt exposed himself to me in the stationery shop. Fortunately, I was so shocked I did not scream or make a fuss. I just calmly walked back to the safety of my mother. I have taken many years to set this experience free. I think I was only about nine years old at the time. Oh well, now, that door is opened, I think I will cast the key into non-existence. I can’t let him have the satisfaction of disturbing me for so long.
I have come across potholes on my journey: they are the times in life when I hurt for other people. I feel their pain and their sadness. My heart aches for them. That is when I write poems, write letters of sympathy, light candles and send flowers. These are the situations in life that prepare one for ones own tough times. Life is fragile. Life is challenging.
Life is also beautiful. Life offers exceptional scenery along the road. Life is the confetti of blossoms which emerge before Spring is comfortably announced. When one is handed one’s new born baby – I remember looking at the baby and wondering why it is not totally familiar! After all it had been nestled inside me for 9 months! The realisation of the miracle of birth is difficult to describe. Probably, the huge responsibility of the child brings one straight back to reality.
Then, there are the places where I store the happy moments. These are possibly the open roads. These are the times when one wants the moment to last forever. Watching ones children grow-up and achieve. Watching them drive off on their own successful adventures.
My road is smooth and the scenery is bright and cheerful. I enjoy the calmness of the journey. These are the comfortable, contented thoughts I have every day. These are my thoughts most often. I am a cheerful person.
Copyright 2008 Beverleigh Gail Annegarn