Obituary For A 20thC Boy, Crits Please. Thanks! Options

[Guest_Jox_*]

© Maxine Brockton, 2005. I, Maxine Brockton, do assert my right to be identified as the author of this work in accordance with Sections 77 and 78 of The Copyrights, Designs And Patents Act, 1988. (Laws of Cymru & England, as recognised by international treaties). This work was simultaneously copyrighted in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and the United States of America. This work is posted as an unpublished work in order to elicit critical assistance and other helpful comment, only.

Start Date: 29/10/2004 - Update: 30/06/2005
Revision thanks to: Alan, Grace, Daniel, Cathy, Butch, Lori and Nina.

Reference: MB 0197 AE

Obituary for A Twentieth-Century Boy
by Maxine Brockton

You were:

bitter
light
dark
sad
happy
concerned
fancy-free
sweet

Asteroids clatter among the Universe;
schoolchildren chatter going into class.
Shopkeepers retail their grandmothers;
undertakers detail precisely the hearse.

And so it goes round; no part too grand...
bit at a time; History reclaims her son.
Couple of beers; in drifts Sixties’ song:
Penny Lane cheers out across the sands.

What events between womb and earth?
No pretence of a linear progression -
staggering along; you did your best.
Puck on-song; you’re beaten by girth!

You:

hurt
healed
frowned
smiled
fought
made-peace
cried
laughed

and cried.

Ashes to ashes,
dust to dust,
Earth to Sun;
Universe to cinders.

Big Bang Number Two!
(Any number will do).
Rebirth!
But not us, my friend...

Let’s just hope
Buddhists are right
in the
very long run.

(end)

--------------------------------------------------------------------
References / Inspirations:

“Penny Lane” - The Beatles (Music)
“Across The Universe” - The Beatles (Music)
“Twentieth-Century Boy” - T.Rex (Music)
“Midsummer’s Night’s dream” - William Shakespeare (Play about Magic)
The Buddhist belief in re-incarnation (Religion)
The Christian burial ceremony (Religion)
The Big Bang theory - Astrophysicists (Science)
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Previous version on MM (there was an intermediate version which was not posted, too): MB 0197 AC

Obituary for A Twentieth-Century Boy
by MB

You were:

Bitter
Light
Dark
Sad
Happy
Concerned
Fancy-Free
Sweet

Asteroids clatter among the Universe;
Schoolchildren chatter going into class.
Shopkeepers retail their grandmothers;
Undertakers detail precisely the hearse.

And so it goes round; No part so grand.
A bit at a time; History calls back her son.
Couple of beers; in-drifts that Sixties’ song;
Penny Lane cheers out across the sands.

What events between womb and earth?
No pretence of a linear progression!
Staggering along; you did your best.
Puck on-song; you’re beaten by girth!

You:

hurt
healed
frowned
smiled
fought
made-peace
cried
laughed

and cried.

Ashes to Ashes
Dust to Dust
Earth to Sun
Universe to Cinders

Big Bang No2!
(Ok, whatever number).
Rebirth!
But not us, my Friend...

Let’s just hope
The Buddhists are
right in the
Very Long Run.

(end)

[Guest_Jox_*]

Hi Butch, seems I owe you an apology - said I would get back to you and never did - I'm very sorry.

Nina has kindly dug this up, giving me a second chance to tidy up and re-consider crits.

So, my answer - just a few months late! :

-----------------------

>B>Just dropped by on my way along the long and winding road.

Thank you!

>B>The chains of life have me horribly locked up and busy.

I hope the Masters Degree is going well, Butch.

>B>As always your work intrigues me.  You walk along paths I would never think of, so you inspire.

Thank you very much - that is a great compliment.

>B>I don't always agree, but isn't that the point, we like to challenge the reader make them think a bit?

Absolutely! There wouldn’t be much point in writing if we always agreed.

>B>Just look at the dialogue you have gotten stoked between two excellent artists such as Daniel and Alan.  Wonderful, you should be proud.

I think I’ve lost this point a little with the passage of time, sorry. But certainly, MM is a great place with many excellent writers.

>B>Interesting you call yourself a liberal.

I suppose I’m a liberal democrat - but we have a major political party of that same name here and I disagree with many of their policies - so liberal democrat with small letters.

>B> Unfortunately that term takes a savage beating here in the states, not unlike the term conservative.  Are we not all supporters of liberty and conservative attitudes - do we not want social support structure and yet some form of moral responsibility?

Here, our equilivilant of the US’s Republican Party is the Conservative Party. So, again, we’re talking lower-case letters,

I am uncomfortable with the term “moral responsibility.” The “responsibility” part is fine. People in “the West” have many rights and, with those, come responsibilities. No argument there. However...

The term “moral” is like the term “common sense.” What you and I and anyone else see as moral or common sense may vary greatly. For example, religions often hi-jack the term “moral” to mean in support of their own view. Countries appropriate religions, too (e.g. in WWI both Britain and Germany had “God on their side.”). Morality is thus a political issue and subject to debate, not absolutism.

On documentaries, I have heard people say “homosexuality is immoral.” Well they are entitled to their opinion but they are claiming “a moral high ground” only for their own opinions. I could equally say their views are immoral - but I’d be doing similar. So, I don’t believe in absolute morality (note also it widely varies between areas, regions, countries and over time). I, therefore, would argue for moral relativity (a philosophical strand) and expect people to make their own minds up on what is moral - if they wish to. For me, personally, the only things immoral are deliberately hurting others when there is no need to. How people live their lives otherwise is up to them. That would be my moral code. I don’t want to tell people they should marry or conduct their lives in any particular way.




>B>You comment about the religions, unfortunately will never happen.  Man cannot understand how something that he didn't control, think of, or do, can occur.  So it must be a God of some form that did it.  Right?

err, well since you ask, nope, I disagree.

But I do agree that gods are devised because of man’s ignorance and incomprehension of his lot.

My central problem on all this is that we cannot comprehend infinity and we cannot comprehend nothing. So the Universe must never end - but it must end. The only answer would seem to be a spherical structure (or Mobius strip!) but. then again, what’s beyond that? However, I’m not in the least inclined to believe that it is a god because - what would be beyond it? A god would not solve the problem.

As regards our own mortality and after life. I just think that is a construct of mankind’s arrogance - we’re special; we’re immortal. However (and this is one way I think religions can help people) such beliefs can bring great comfort to millions - so I’m glad for them that they believe. I wouldn’t mind believing myself, actually. Providing Heaven had dogs. Mind you, it wouldn’t be heaven without, of course.

>B>Religions go back even beyond the three you mention, Gilgamesh ring a bell?  There were wars before the 5000 year old wars we now fight, and they were about Gods and religion.  There will always be wars about Gods, because we - man - just can't let the other guy believe the way he wants to, now can we?

An info link:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epic_of_Gilgamesh

Butch, I agree with that - we always try to impose our beliefs and our will on others. All is political; religion merely a political tool - at that level.

>B>Awh but I too forget why I opened this door. Crits, hard to say - you always write so well -

Thanks Butch.

>B>I agree with the caps they throw me at times.  I am no means a grammar expert so I attempt to interpret, usually to my demise.  

Nope, I’m a grammar ignoramus. I’ll look at that, thanks.

>B>I also agree with Cybele and the word - died instead of cried.  Brings a finality to it.

emm... I may change that now - thanks, Butch.

>B>I can identify a friend I recently lost in your work, so it has an impact.

Thank you.

>B>Thank you friend for sharing.

Thanks Butch and my big apologies for such a late response. Hope you see this.

J.