Through
the journey of life,
our masks may change
and distances vary.
Equate
to the strength of bones
and yet,
it is in the depth
of our footprints,
where
true salvation remains.
Dear James,
Hmmm, very deep, if I am not mistaken. Could equally well apply to "a" life's journey, or to a whole sequence of lives.
Loe
Alan
thank you alan
I am glad you enjoyed the piece
regards
hellfire
Hi James,
I don't believe I've read any poems by you before. It's a pleasure to meet you!!
This poem has two very deep statements as far as I'm concerned: The beginning and the end. The middle leaves me uncertain as to meaning. I also think you can probably fine a new title without having to repeat the word "footprints." Personally, when I read free verse I don't enjoy seeing repeated words.
Through
the journey of life,
our masks may change
and distances vary.( Clear and wise first sentence)
Equate
to the strength of bones("Equate" what exactly to "strength of bones"? Not clear.)
and yet,
it is in the depth (This line and following lines are profound!)
of our footprints,
where
true salvation remains.(I'd like to change the final line to read "our true mark is made.")
Use or lose! You're the poet and make the final decisions!
Perhaps a title such as "A Life's Value."
Enjoyed the read!!!
Peggy
hi peggy
thank you for the comments and support.
with regards to the line:"strength of bones" it is the physical strength that we have that is never enough on our journey to salvation .it should be based on the stength of our character and spiritual awareness .our life should be focused on quality instead of quanitity with regards to the legacy we leave behind.
i hope this clarifies most of your questions and thank you again for support.
regards
hellfire
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